Painkiller by N. J. Fountain


About the Book

I cannot go on like this. I feel such a burden to you. You are young and can start again. You deserve that chance. By the time you read this I will be dead. Do not grieve for me, for I am now without pain.

Yours truly for ever,
Monica suffers from chronic neuropathic pain. Every second of her life is spent in agony, and she is coping with it the best she can. However, there are whole years of her life which are a blur to her.
But when she finds a suicide note, written in her handwriting, she begins to question everything. She has no memory of writing it – so who did? And if someone tried to kill her once, what’s to say they won’t try again . . .

My Review

The blurb on the cover states that this book is likened to Before I Go To Sleep and for once it is accurate. Monica, the main character is a very unreliable narrator. She is in constant pain and takes a cocktail of drugs to try and ease it. The side effects from the drugs cause memory problems, mood swings, depression and hallucinations. All these make it difficult to work out if she is believable. By her own admission, she wasn’t a very nice person before the accident, she could be cruel to her husband and even after she was critical about his appearance and career. But he seemed to accept it and at times they did seem close. I liked the conversations she had with him when each encouraged the other to hang up first.
Her husband, a friend and a detective also tell their version of events. These make you doubt more about what is happening. All views differed and I had no idea who could be believed.
I found it a quick and easy read, despite reading about Monica’s constant pain which was a little draining at times. I wouldn’t have liked her before her accident but I found her to be determined person who was desperate to beat the pain. Each chapter was short and intriguing enough to read another. I had no idea which way was going to go and even though the culprit wasn’t a surprise the ending was a bit of a shock.
With thanks to the publisher for the copy received.

2 Replies to “Painkiller by N. J. Fountain”

  1. I’ve seen others also saying the constant pain topic was draining to read about. For me the comparison to Before I Go to Sleep is actually stopping me from reading this one, I think I’m one of the only people who didn’t like that book. Great review!


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